hints from a younger, blonder heloise
May 31st, 2006 @ 1:41 pm | blonde moments, domestic | Post a CommentI know I’ve almost hit my quarter-life birthday, but keeping my tiny apartment consistently clean is still kind of a struggle for me. I try to keep a decent level of sanitation so that when people come over they won’t think I am still in college and/or serve as an overflow cat shelter, because why else would there be SO MUCH DAMN CAT HAIR EVERYWHERE? Vacuuming is key to ths effort.
In an effort to pass along some housekeeping wisdom, I offer you these fabulous tips on vacuuming. Speaking from experience, I advise you to:
1. Change the bag. Oh, this one may sound simple. Duh! Change the bag! Well, I wish somebody had told me that two years ago. (Mom?) All this time I thought I had a crappy vacuum, but really, the bag was just explode-upon-contact full. Like you know the dotted line halfway up the bag that says “Fill Line”? If you fill the bag past that line and beyond until it’s so full it bursts, that is TOO. FULL. and will not pick up a single speck of dirt. It will just reshuffle it around the carpet like those nifty little gadgets they have at crappy all-you-can-eat buffet restaurants.
And honestly? The replacement bags are $3 for a 3-pack. Cheaper than toothpaste. And I certainly hope no one out there is so cheap as to avoid using toothpaste, but if you are, I do not want to hang out with you.
2. Pay attention! When you are merrily using the vacuum with it’s new, empty bag on a hot, summer weekend afternoon, don’t accidentally brush past the thermostat and crank the heat up to 99 degrees without noticing. Because for the next 24 hours you will find yourself in a miserable and uncontrollable sweat that will make you so delerious that you will not be able to figure out the source of the heat. This heat will possibly drive you to jump off a cliff and also quadruble your electricity bill for the month because you will be forced to crank up the ancient air conditioning unit to High to try to cool the damn place off. All that time, you could have just not turned the heat up in the first place. On accident. While vacuuming.
Hey, at least my carpets look nice!
Janet! I’m so glad you’re back and I totally agree with you. I am thinking that they need to teach a class on this at colleges because I have similar vacuuming issues. I might even need it more because my bag/canister is clear and I was still having problems. I thought it wasn’t filling up because it was broken but it turns out that crazy amounts of dog hair can clog the filter and the dirt doesn’t even make it to the cansiter. The canister stays empty and I just keep wondering why it doesn’t really look that clean. oops.
written by Sarah
May 31st, 2006 @ 2:07 pm
It’s also useful to check on the brush part. That gets clogged too.
It’s gross and I make my roommates do it.
written by Alexa
May 31st, 2006 @ 2:48 pm
My best helper for corners and around counter tops… A DUSTBUSTER!!! Also great for hairballs that collect behind garbage cans/toilets.. etc.
written by Jane
May 31st, 2006 @ 4:56 pm
My poor Roomba! I never knew ONE Siamese cat could possibly ever shed that much hair….or is it fur? I had to flip the Roomba over and suck out the fluff with the Hoover!!! Now I Roomba every single morning.
DUST IS MY PROBLEM!!! WAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!
No matter how much I dust it comes back a few hours later and I have four Ionic Breezes in my room alone.
Can you tell how much I like the Sharper Image catalog?
written by Della
May 31st, 2006 @ 11:02 pm
Did you register for a Dyson for your wedding? If not you totally should. It is fabulous, plus no bags! But you do have to clean out the roller thingy often, or at least we do, but then again we have the most sheddy cats ever.
written by jessica
June 1st, 2006 @ 5:47 am
HA - that is too funny! I know that I need to change my bag, too, but instead I just keep putting off vacuuming. Smart, right?
written by Liberal Banana
June 1st, 2006 @ 8:17 am
ahhh…I have another. Never vacuum up salsa that you spill on your carpet, then go out of town for a week without changing the bag.
Nice! It molded in the bag AND the vacuum. Now my vacuum in soooooo stinky that it is unusable. Wish I’d known that before my husband did it.
written by Paige
June 1st, 2006 @ 8:58 am
Last night I performed SPEED vacuuming! The hubby was a little irritated that I wanted to start at 9:45pm so I promised to have it done in 20 minutes. And I did! But it was kind of a work-out, and I might not have been so careful
written by Alison
June 1st, 2006 @ 9:06 am
I used to complain about how much my vacuum sucked (no pun intended) and then my boyfriend FINALLY looked at it, and it turned out that I had accidentally thrown away the filter when I changed the bag. BEWARE: do not throw away the filter!
I hate vacumming, but I also have two cats so it is necessary from time to time. I bought myself a Dyson to make vacumming more fun, and it sort of worked. At least so far!
written by Jennifer
June 1st, 2006 @ 7:02 pm
Della, you gotta step away from the Sharper Image! But I totally understand; that store makes you think you have problems you didn’t even know existed in the world.
Jess, I think we will register for a Dyson, just for kicks. But, um, we haven’t quite done the whole registering thing yet. What’s the normal time frame for that?
and Paige, that just sounds GROSS! Thanks for the warning!
written by janet
June 1st, 2006 @ 7:52 pm
My vaccum has a clear section that shows how much fluff and stuff it’s picked up, so that totally helps. They should make clear bags as a reminder, but that would be tough to make them as durable.
written by Tanya L.
July 7th, 2006 @ 10:44 am