urban zoo animal
March 30th, 2008 @ 6:46 pm | dc | Post a CommentWhen we started house hunting last summer it quickly became clear that the kinds of places we could afford in the city were in somewhat sketchy neighborhoods. We looked at several dozen places, and in a good number of them I feared for our safety. In the end, we stretched our budget a little bit and ended up with a place where we feel safe almost all the time.
It helps that every single door and window of our home has bars on it. I like the bars! I know that nobody can break in unless they have the strength to bend steel beams. Of course, anything can happen on the street, but you can say that about any street in this city.
So yeah, we live in a city where crime happens, drug deals happen. We’re careful and alert and so far we haven’t been the victim of anything bad in our new neighborhood or anywhere else in the city. I hope that streak is never broken.
But see, there’s still this one thing that scares me.
Behind our house is a very, very creepy alley. It twists and turns and widens until you end up behind some big buildings on a totally different street. There’s a bunch of abandoned junk strewn around, and it might even serve as a campground for homeless guys, though I’ve never caught anyone back there.
Except for this:
A big, stuffed cheetah. He’s just chillin’ on a lawn chair in a patch of bamboo. Every single time I round the corner and spot him, he freaks me out!
But really, he’s harmless. I hope.
I hope that this cheetah remains my biggest danger in the neighborhood. But I’m still making my husband take out the trash. I don’t want to take any chances.
lol, how random is that??!?!?!
written by Jen
March 30th, 2008 @ 7:05 pm
OH that is soooo weird!
written by Nic
March 30th, 2008 @ 7:30 pm
maybe it’s there to scare people away…
Kind of like an urban scarecrow.
written by Julie
March 30th, 2008 @ 7:56 pm
I prefer that kind of danger.
written by kirida
March 30th, 2008 @ 8:50 pm
Oh, for the love. I thought it was a giraffe! And not stuffed!
When we were house-hunting, we looked at such crappy places, which I guess came with our low budget. But persistence pays off, doesn’t it? And safety first!
written by RA
March 30th, 2008 @ 9:22 pm
IM IN UR ALLEYZ, HIDIN IN UR BAMBOOZ
written by Operation Pink Herring
March 30th, 2008 @ 9:27 pm
That’s a good idea about the trash! (And don’t worry, if you decide you’re no longer scared, I won’t tell him so. Let him handle it!)
written by Zandria
March 30th, 2008 @ 9:59 pm
hahaha. That thing is SUPER creepy!
written by Emily
March 30th, 2008 @ 10:44 pm
lol at this post… and I love the comment up there by Operation Pink Herring too!
written by Melissa
March 30th, 2008 @ 10:51 pm
I’m sure that would spook me too! Alley’s are scary even in the best neighborhood in my opinion. Remember the homeless guy who used to live behind my house? He used our hose to bathe during the day (we know because he left behind his bar of soap). And that was in a very suburban neighborhood!
written by ambitiousmrs
March 30th, 2008 @ 11:11 pm
He looks so sad and lonely. Maybe you can adopt him and give him a nice home– take a cat off the streets!
written by Lele
March 31st, 2008 @ 2:19 am
Janet, you know when I tell people about bars on windows they look at me funny.
I guess it’s a DC thing.
written by Abbie
March 31st, 2008 @ 9:52 am
Can I ask why this is there??
written by Britni
March 31st, 2008 @ 9:53 am
I’ve always had the policy that if I’m driving in a city and I get to an area with bars on the windows, I need to get THE HELL OUT in a big, big hurry. I’m kinda…well….shocked that anyone as non-trashy and intelligent as yourself lives in such a location, but maybe it’s not reserved for the really bad neighborhoods (as you seem to indicate). I still think it’d make me awfully nervous.
written by Nathan Pralle
March 31st, 2008 @ 10:42 am
It’s like an urban scarecrow … keeping the up-to-no-good at bay!
written by Nilsa S.
March 31st, 2008 @ 11:03 am
I don’t know where this false sense of concern about that cheetah is coming from. He is clearly out there making deals.
written by elise
March 31st, 2008 @ 11:33 am
That guy is scary!! He kind of looks like he might try to take a swipe at you.
written by Laurel
March 31st, 2008 @ 11:55 am
I LOVE the Cheetah. I wish I could take credit for putting him there.
There’s bars on many windows in Georgetown and in your old ‘hood too. It is just city living.
written by Alexa
March 31st, 2008 @ 1:53 pm
well at least it’s stuffed
but STILL. kinda creepy if you didn’t put it there…
written by Michelle & the City
March 31st, 2008 @ 2:56 pm
Love the cheetah. It would probably scare the crap out of me, too, everytime I encountered it.
I just could not live behind bars. So KUDOS to you. I’d be telling Trent that yeah, we’d have to move to a city where I wouldn’t have to have bars on my window (we actually almost had to move to Chicago….and the house we had picked had bars. scary…)…
written by mel
March 31st, 2008 @ 2:56 pm
Okay… that’s hilarious. And creepy. But mostly hilarious. I think you should name him Squishy, and he shall be your Squishy!
written by alyndabear
March 31st, 2008 @ 4:29 pm
Oh my gosh, that is so randomly hilarious!! I hope you always stay safe from the cheetah and his wicked ways…
written by Wickedly Scarlett
March 31st, 2008 @ 4:36 pm
haha, that would definitely freak me out too.
written by katelin
March 31st, 2008 @ 4:55 pm
I didn’t know there was a cheetah in our neighborhood!! Be careful!
written by Jen
March 31st, 2008 @ 6:49 pm
I don’t think I would mind the bars so much. I have seen some really cute townhomes (are they called rowhouses in the city?) in DC that are very quaint looking even with the bars. Piece of mind I suppose.
Totally off topic: I must confess that each time I use my razor in the shower (usually at 5am) I’m afraid I’m going to accidentally slice my eyeball. I read your story a while back but it STILL haunts me to this day.
written by K
April 1st, 2008 @ 8:42 am
Have you seen those new Chester the Cheetah ads for Cheetohs? I read this hilarious Slate article about him. He’s quite a pimp daddy now. Your bf better not leave you alone w/him er…it.
written by Marisa
April 1st, 2008 @ 10:28 am