love is blonde

There are a lot of things I could say today, on our three year wedding anniversary. Like how I’m really glad we got married on a federal holiday, and how much I’m thankful to veterans for letting me “share” this day with them. Like how I have a pretty darn fabulous husband who is sweet and thoughtful.

One one hand, this perfect day in Mexico seems like ages ago. Since that day many friends have gotten married (two in Cabo even!), some have had babies, people have moved across the country and taken new jobs. We of course still get together and laugh about some of the best wedding memories.

I’m very grateful for the last three years, and a little bit excited to think about what the next year holds for us. By our 4th anniversary, there’s a chance we will have plans to move across the country too, or even have a baby on the way. (Don’t worry! Not pregnant! Just thinking ahead a little…)

Thanks to everyone out there (in real life, facebook, and bloggy friends) for your love and good wishes today, and especially to you longtime readers who went through all my OCD wedding planning years ago. And to my husband – I love you sweets!

I know I’m supposed to be off smootching on my two-years-now-husband, but I had to pop on here to brag about one thing.

Just before dinner, to suprise me, he changed into the suit he wore for our wedding. Seriously, how cute and sentimental is that?!?!

Swoon.

Also, he got me just what I wanted: freshly burned CDs of new music, most of it from the Grey’s Anatomy Soundtrack or Joshua Radin’s new album. All I got him was a dwarf lime tree. Which may or may not ever bear fruit. (But if it does, you are so invited over for a kick ass margarita party.)

And, oh my, we had the best dinner tonight. We dined at Montmartre, and I had gazpacho, scallops with zucchini, and pumpkin cheesecake. One of the best meals I’ve ever had in DC.

I’ve been far from a perfect wife this year, but all I can say is that I appreciate very much what we have and plan to hold onto it very tightly.

Five Valentine’s Days ago, I was single. I was hardly alone, living with four girlfriends, two cats, and the social calendar of a typical sorority girl. But definitely single. I’m not sure if I ever had a boyfriend over Valentine’s Day in college, but I don’t think so because I barely ever had a boyfriend. I was kind of sick of it, too. It seemed like all my roommates and friends at least had someone to make out with on a regular basis.

I was ready to give up on meeting new boys and go back to my high school ex-boyfriend. I probably knew all along that was a bad idea but sometimes when you’re single anything seems better than nothing. Little did I know that two weeks later I would meet my future husband.

*****

Four Valentine’s Days ago was a world away. It was the final week of Howard Dean’s presidential campaign and I was losing my job. I had nowhere to live (unless you count my parents’ house, but my dad told me, “You don’t live here anymore,” so I don’t think that counts) and I thought I might have to say goodbye to this great guy who I was pretty sure I was in love with.

We had spent the last nine months together nearly 24/7, but we didn’t much talk about our relationship. We were too busy working and surviving and experiencing. We never talked about “us” and “the future” but it was clear that we were good for each other. We took chances together and we made a good team. But life could have easily led us apart at this juncture.

*****

Three Valentine’s Days ago we were “officially” living together, co-parents to fluffy gray cat. Plain, old, everyday living-in-sin life. What can I say? I didn’t have a blog then so I can’t go back and read about it. He probably got me flowers and a card with a cute kitten on it. I knew he was wonderful.

*****

Two Valentine’s Days ago we were engaged to be married. I was so thrilled to be obsessively planning; our beach wedding dreams were taking shape. I remember finally starting to feel like an adult and less like a teenager masquerading around as one. It aged me to think that I was old enough for people to trust me to make a decision about spending my whole life with someone.

*****

One Valentine’s Day ago we were newlyweds. We toasted each other in our pretty new crystal glasses and remembered the wedding vows still fresh in our minds. We talked about our wedding a lot still, and how perfect it was. We thought about what the year would bring: a new job and a new place to live, we hoped.

*****

This year Valentine’s Day will probably be like any other day. We won’t go out to a fancy dinner or exchange presents, but we will be together in our new home. And I’ll think about just how much life can change in five years, and how lucky I am to have found so much love.

I am somewhat hesitant to talk about love and marriage on this blog (despite the title, I suppose) for two reasons. One is privacy. This little corner of the internet is not hidden from my real life and because many readers know my husband too, I have two people’s privacy to be thinking about. Two, I can imagine for those out there who are not in happy relationships (either not in a relationship at all or in one but unhappily), hearing saccharine musings on love and forever togetherness probably just makes you want to gag on your lunch.

I will try to avoid both upchuck and sounding like a family-values conservative, but I love being married. Sometimes I wonder how time passed so quickly and I ended up going from crazy college girl to bride to smug married. Then again, I feel like marriage just fits us. I’d feel naked if I faced the day without it. With it though, I feel all cozy and warm and happy. It’s good, really, really good.

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NaBloPoMo is killing me, and I am not even doing it! I have been trying really hard to keep up my reading and my commenting, but dang you people are dedicated! For Thanksgiving I will be in the land of dial-up (who knew that still existed, and along the I-95 corridor no less!) and I will no doubt come home to hundreds of unread posts in my feed reader. I am already planning to sneak away to the free Panera Bread WiFi once or twice but no promises, people. It’s more likely I will be in a stuffing-induced coma and unable to drive or type.

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I am working on compiling my Christmas wishlist and will post it here when it’s finished. I’m having a much harder time with the gift-giving list this year, mostly with parent gifts. Is anyone getting their parents something really awesome, not cheesy/boring, and not too expensive? Do tell! I know Black Friday hasn’t even happened yet but I am feeling behind on my shopping and if I have to traverse the mall in med-December I might instead choose to jump off a bridge.

Even though the husband and I missed celebrating our first anniversary on the 366th day of wedded bliss, (and considering we got legally married in the courthouse two weeks before our wedding anyway, we are already on shaky ground with the exactness of things) we are going to have a little getaway in our own city this weekend.

I found a super-cheap rate at a semi-fancy-ish hotel downtown and we are going to spend a night there pretending we are somewhere far away. No phone calls allowed, no sneaking onto the WiFi, no scooping the cat litter. And also, no packing bags for an entire weekend away, no traffic, no security lines. We will be out of town in town.

When I booked the hotel online I wrote in the comment field that we would be celebrating an anniversary. Best case scenario they upgrade us to a suite. Worst case, we get no special treatment, which is totally fine too.

I still don’t know if we will get an upgrade, but I know they took note of my extra comment because the hotel’s “Romance Concierge” has sent me no fewer than four emails congratulating me on my anniversary and promoting their special romantic add-on packages.

For example, for the small, small price of between $165 and $255 plus tax and 20% gratuity (!) (the lower price being more than the room itself), we can indulge in:

• Isabella hydrating lotion. I think I’ll stick with my Cürel, thanks. Is this “hydrating lotion” a highbrow version of this product or something?
• Shimmering bath salts. I’m cool with taking a bubble bath, but I do not need to sparkle like a My Little Pony when I get out.
• Chocolate body paint in three colors. Seriously?! Do you people have a vendetta against the housekeeping staff at your hotel? Do you really want to clean up crusty bits of cinnamon mocha paste from god knows where in the room? Please for the love of all future guests, do not offer this product.
• Vanilla whipped cream. Do you think I get my jollies reenacting scenes featuring James van der Beek (the not-hot Dawson Leery) from Varsity Blues from HIGH SCHOOL?! No, I do not.
• An assortment of tantalizing hors d’oeuvres. Do you think they make little penises out of crudités? Perhaps some little vah-jay-jays out of pickled ginger? (Okay, I am such a prude, I am grossing myself out here. This is NOT ROMANTIC.)
• Red balloons. This is an anniversary, not a toddler’s birthday party.
• A book of love poems. At least this one isn’t gross or messy, but I doubt it’s worth hundreds of dollars. Or even tens of dollars. Or even one dollar.
• Chiffon-scented candle. Perhaps I haven’t been paying attention to Project Runway, but isn’t chiffon a fabric? When I think of the stale odor of my local fabric store I do not think of romance.
• “The Romantic Game for Lovers.” Whatever that is. I’d rather stick with Truth or Dare if we are going to play silly games. Or maybe Spin the Bottle! I would suggest the Baby Name Game but that doesn’t usually go over very well on Date Night around here.

Le sigh. I guess I am just an old fuddy duddy or something. I would never pay that kind of money for their “romantic” packages. I am, however, quite looking forward to our faux getaway, and if anyone would like to volunteer to feed my cats while we are “gone,” I will offer you my undying love. And I vow that I will never show you my love by lathering you up with glittery chocolate chiffon body paint. Ever. You can thank me later.